Let’s Talk About Bullying (and What You Can Do About It)

New insights from the Guernsey Quality of Life Report shine a spotlight on a growing concern that’s having a devastating effect on our children: bullying. Among the children surveyed, one in three said they had been bullied at or near their school in the past 12 months. Year 8 students reported the highest rates - four in ten - which is a two-thirds increase since 2019.

This report is a wake-up call, and a chance for parents, schools, and the wider community to come together and make a difference. Because the findings are not just numbers. These are our children. Children who are quietly suffering, at a time in their lives when they should be feeling safe, carefree and happy.

 

 

Some of our young people are experiencing more bullying and have lower self-esteem than ever before.

Guernsey Quality of Life Report 2025

 

Bullying Can Be Subtle.

While most of us hope we would know if something was wrong, the reality is that bullying can be subtle. It can be hard to spot, especially when children try to downplay what’s happening. And they don’t always tell us - sometimes because they’re not even sure what’s happening themselves.

But there are clear signs to watch for, and practical steps we can all take to help. Whether your child is openly struggling or silently coping, this guide will help you feel better equipped to support them.

So how do we spot the signs? And what can we do about it?

 

What Bullying Looks Like Today.

In 2025, bullying isn’t always about bruises and playground scraps. It’s often hidden in a group chat. It’s being left out. It's an ‘accidental’ bump in the corridor. It’s the mean ‘jokes’ or the pictures shared without permission.

UNICEF defines bullying as repeated, intentional behaviour that hurts someone physically or emotionally. And while it often peaks around secondary school age, it can start earlier, especially online. 

In a small community like Guernsey, children have less social space to escape. Friendship circles are tight and school groups stay together for years. And when bullying happens, the impact can be deep.

 

 

A lot of the Island’s young people are hurting. Low self-esteem, bullying, poor mental health, anxiety about the future… and the extent to which many of them are struggling does not appear to be fully or widely appreciated. 

Guernsey Quality of Life Report 2025

 

What To Look Out For.

Children rarely say, ‘I’m being bullied.’ Instead, you might notice small shifts in mood, behaviour, or habits. Here are some red flags to look for:

• Changes in routine such as avoiding school, suddenly not wanting to go to clubs or parties

• Mood swings, such as becoming quieter, clingier, or more irritable than usual

• Physical signs such as unexplained bruises, damaged clothes or possessions

• Health complaints, such as headaches, stomach aches, or trouble sleeping

• Eating changes, such as skipping meals or comfort-eating

• Loss of interest, when things like hobbies and friendships that used to bring joy are dropped
  
  

Sometimes the changes are subtle. For example, a child who always loved school suddenly dreads Mondays. Or a confident teen becomes withdrawn and anxious. Trust your instincts. If something feels off, don’t dismiss it.

 

 

What You Can Do.

If you’re worried your child might be facing bullying, here are some simple steps you can take…

1. Create a safe space to talk.

Start small. Instead of jumping straight in with ‘Are you being bullied?’ try asking open-ended questions like: ’Who did you hang out with at school today?’ or ‘Have you seen anything unkind happening at school lately?’. Knowing that you’re taking an interest might be enough to start the conversation, so try not to pressure your child for answers. Simply let them know they can talk to you, or another trusted adult, whenever they’re ready.

2. Reassure and support.

If your child opens up, try not to overreact - even if it’s breaking your heart to hear what they have to say. Start by listening and letting them know you believe them. Thank them for sharing. Let them know it’s not their fault, and that you’re in this together.

3. Talk to the school.

Most Guernsey schools have a clear anti-bullying policy, so arrange a calm, non-confrontational meeting with staff to talk about your concerns. Share what your child has told you and ask how the school can help. It’s important to keep communication open, and ask for regular check-ins to track how your child, and the school, are progressing.

4. Support their confidence.

Help your child to rebuild their confidence by encouraging them to spend time in places where they feel safe and strong. Maybe that’s with their teammates at their sports club. Or maybe they'd enjoy doing creative hobbies together, or spending time with extended family. Positive reinforcement outside school can act as a buffer against the impact of bullying.

5. Know when to seek help.

Bullying can lead to anxiety, depression, or low self-esteem. If your child is struggling emotionally, it’s okay to get additional support. Most schools have at least one member of staff trained in Mental Health First Aid, so find out who that is and speak to them in the first instance, or speak to your GP. You can also contact the Youth Commission for advice.

 

 

Beyond The School Gates.

Bullying isn’t just a school issue. It’s a community issue. It happens in parks, at bus stops, on the beach, and increasingly on phones and screens. Social media, group chats, and gaming platforms can be breeding grounds for subtle, persistent bullying that’s hard for adults to see.

That’s why open communication is so important. As parents, we can’t control every conversation or click, but we can talk to our children about kindness, consent, and respect both online and offline. We can help them recognise red flags and know when to speak up. 

 

Where to Find Support in Guernsey.

If you’re worried that your child is being bullied, help is available.

• Your child’s school can be a great starting point. Speak to a trusted teacher or safeguarding lead.

• The Youth Commission provides free counselling and 1:1 support tailored for young people.

• Your GP can help with advice or refer you to local mental health services if needed.

• Online resources like Young Minds, Childline and Shout offer information and support night and day.